Passage to Indian Carrot Salad

It’s 2:29pm, three days after Christmas. I’m nursing a glass of water at home in Brooklyn, watching Emeril on Food Network, and going over my TO DO list before I go to India.

I’m going to India. I have to keep typing this because I don’t quite believe it yet, even though the plane leaves in 52 hours and 29 minutes. I’m not packed (next on the TO DO list), but I think everything else has been accomplished. The rent is paid, my Visa is all set up, and I’ve had more shots in the last month than most firing squad victims. I am immune to EVERYTHING, up to and including polio, rabies, and that weird virus that made everyone zombies in 28 Days Later.

I’ll be overseas until January 8th, and returning to blogdom on the 10th. In the meantime, Rachel the Cheap Healthy Gourmet has graciously agreed to fill in during my absence. (Read: she’s tied up in the basement with nothing but gruel and a laptop.) While I’m gasping in wonder at the Taj Mahal and trying desperately to avoid an exciting intestinal malaise, you’ll be treated to seven straight days of really, really good recipes and writing. Besides being the best roommate ever, Rach is also the best home cook I know, so I promise y’all are in good hands.

In celebration of the trip (paid for in part by months of hardcore food budgeting), I attempted an Indian Carrot Salad from The Food of India cookbook last night. It turned out okay, but would have been better if I hadn't messed with the directions so excessively. To wit: I added too much lemon juice, made a mustard substitution that didn’t work, and heated the oil to near-bubbling, all of which turned the carrots a little bitter. Ultimately, though it wasn’t terrible (and I’ll finish the dish), I do suggest following the exact measurements and instructions for best results. Which, like – duh.

That aside, I hope everyone’s New Year is ever-so-lovely, and I’ll see y’all again in two weeks. Whee!

P.S. All spices were purchased bulk from my local ethnic market, which is why the prices are so low.

Indian Carrot Salad
Serves 3
Adapted from The Food of India.

½ tablespoon oil (I used vegetable oil – Kris)
1/8 teaspoon black mustard seeds (I used Dijon mustard. Bad idea. – Kris)
1/8 teaspoon cumin seeds
pinch of ground turmeric
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon caster (superfine granulated) sugar
¾ tablespoon lemon juice
9 oz (about 3 large) carrots, finely grated
A few coriander (cilantro) leaves (I left this out – Kris)

1) In a small saucepan, heat oil over medium heat. Add mustard and cumin seeds. Cover pan. Shake until seeds begin popping.

2) Uncover pan. Add turmeric, salt, and sugar. Remove from heat and let cool for 5 minutes. Add lemon juice and stir. Add carrot and mix thoroughly. "Cover and leave for 30 minutes." If you like top with coriander/cilantro when served.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price per Serving
57 calories, 2.5 g fat, $0.26

Calculations
½ T oil: 62 calories, 7 g fat, $0.01
1/8 t black mustard seeds: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
1/8 t cumin seeds: negligible calories and fat, $0.05
pinch of ground turmeric: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
1/8 t salt: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1/8 t caster (superfine granulated) sugar: 3 calories, 0 g fat, $0.01
¾ T lemon juice: 2 calories, 0 g fat, $0.20
9 oz (about 3 large) carrots, finely grated: 105 calories, 0.6 g fat, $0.45
TOTAL: 172 calories, 7.6 g fat, $0.77
PER SERVING (TOTAL/3): 57 calories, 2.5 g fat, $0.26

Fast Food Done Good: Garlicky Broccoli Rabe

It always strikes me as fishy when famous cooks claim they can whip up a ten-course, gourmet-caliber meal in 30 seconds or less. It seems to go against the whole idea that effort produces a proportional result. I’m all for convenience, especially on a weeknight, but yeah – I wonder if truly great dishes must have truly great amounts of time invested in them.

Then, days like Sunday happen and mess me up.

See, I was looking for a side dish to go with Cooking Light's Butternut Squash, Rosemary, and Garlic Lasagna. The lasagna had taken me approximately 4,000 years to make, and I wasn’t up for another mammoth exertion, so its accompaniment had to be easy and ready instantaneously. A quick search brought me to Cooking Light’s Garlicky Broccoli Rabe, which had six cheap ingredients and a 10-minute cooking time. Jumanji!

With the rabe sautéed and the lasagna sufficiently settled, The Boyfriend, me, and two large glasses of Sauvignon Blanc sat for a cozy pre-winter meal. The lasagna, though fairly tasty, disintegrated into noodles and cream almost instantaneously. It was more like thick pasta with white sauce and a few chunks of butternut squash. (The leftovers weren’t great, either. There's still half left five days later.)

The rabe, though? THAT was a keeper. With a touch of heat, just the right amount of bitterness, and all that garlicky scrumptiousness, it was quickly nominated for regular rotation.

So, what do I take away from this experience?

1) I’m wrong a lot.
2) Nope, that’s it.

Cooking Light was (as always) gracious enough to provide calories and fat, so only the price is calculated below.

Garlicky Broccoli Rabe
3 servings – ½ cup each
Adapted from Cooking Light.

1 pound broccoli rabe (rapini), trimmed
1/2 tablespoon olive oil
1 large garlic cloves, thinly sliced
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper

1) Fill a medium bowl with cold water and a couple of ice cubes. Set aside.

2) In a medium saucepan, bring a few cups of water to a boil. Add broccoli rabe and boil about 6 minutes, until it's crisp, but tender. Drain and quickly add broccoli rabe to ice bath. Drain again and chop into bite-sized pieces.

3) In a large skillet, heat oil over medium heat. Add garlic and cook until fragrant (about 30 seconds to 1 minute), stirring frequently. Add broccoli rabe, salt, and peppers and warm through, stirring occasionally. Serve hot.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price Per Serving
67 calories, 2.3 g fat, $0.38

Calculations
1 pounds broccoli rabe (rapini), trimmed: $0.99
1/2 tablespoon olive oil: $0.04
1 large garlic cloves, thinly sliced: $0.05
1/4 teaspoon salt: $0.01
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper: $0.02
1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper: $0.02
TOTAL: $1.13
PER SERVING (TOTAL/3): $0.38

Lentil Soup: Friends, Romans, Christmasmen, Lentil Me Your Ear

(Apologies for the title. Punnerific!)

Just in time for the holidays, it’s the Christmasiest dish of all: Lentil Soup!

Okay, not really. While Lentil Soup doesn’t scream O Come All Ye Faithful, it is most definitely a meal for frigid December nights – a dense, stewy comfort food that may not be fancy enough to serve guests, but does just fine for on a random Wednesday.

Like every other food that's not pasta or chicken, I’m kind of new to lentils. They careened into my life during a braising class about a year ago, like some savory, wine-infused comet. Needless to say, Cabernet Sauvignon + veal stock + anything = highly satisfying, so my introduction was totally jolly and very bright. However, I do understand why some might have an aversion to lentils. Honestly, they’re kind of dry, and there’s only so much you can do to make ‘em kick. BUT, prepared with some flair (FLAIR!), they’re pretty palatable. Good, even.

This dish fits the flair bill. (The flair bill? Okay, I’ll go with it.) It’s an All Recipes special that starts with a rough mire poix and then simmers long enough to infuse everything with a gentle, savory flava.

Based on reviewer comments, I reduced the olive oil by half, opted for diced tomatoes, substituted chicken stock for half the water, and chose balsamic vinegar over red wine vinegar. They were all good suggestions, though I might cut back on the vinegar. It nearly overpowered the other flavors.

Based on my own preferences, I nixed the spinach called for in the original recipe. I’m raw spinach’s biggest fan, but the cooked stuff seriously grosses me out. I vividly remember accidentally biting into a diner spinach roll a few years ago and nearly spitting it back at my sister. She was not pleased, but – yick.

Also? I think I may have finally learned how to “salt and pepper to taste.” This is very exciting, since I formerly interpreted that particular direction as “salt and pepper until your tongue turns into a raisin.” My new understanding is that salt should be applied enough to highlight and strengthen a flavor, but not become a flavor in itself. Three cheers.
So - here it is. Hope you like it, and I'll be back late next week with new posts. Happy holidays!

Lentil Soup
Makes six large servings
Adapted from All Recipes.

1 onion, chopped
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 carrots, diced
2 stalks celery, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1 bay leaf
1 teaspoon dried basil
1 (14.5 ounce) can diced tomatoes
2 cups dry lentils
8 cups water (OR 4 cups water and 4 cups broth)
2 tablespoons vinegar
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

1) In a large pot or dutch oven, heat oil over medium heat. Add onions, carrots, and celery. Saute until onion is soft and tender, stirring occasionally. Add garlic, bay leaf, oregano, and basil. Saute another 2 minutes, stirring occasionally.

2) Add lentils. Stir. Add water and tomatoes. Stir again and bring to a boil. Once soup begins boiling, drop heat to medium-low and simmer for a minimum of 60 minutes.

3) When soup is just about done, stir in spinach and continue cooking until it wilts. Add vinegar. Salt and pepper to taste. Serve hot.

Approximate Calories, Fat, and Price per Serving
356.5 calories, 7.2 g fat, $0.69

Calculations
1 onion, chopped: 46 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.15
2 tablespoons olive oil: 239 calories, 27 g fat, $0.16
2 carrots, diced: 50 calories, 0.3 g fat, $0.20
2 stalks celery, chopped: 11 calories, 0.1 g fat, $0.40
2 cloves garlic, minced: 9 calories, 0 g fat, $0.10
1 teaspoon dried oregano: negligible fat and calories, $0.02
1 bay leaf: negligible fat and calories, $0.03
1 teaspoon dried basil: negligible fat and calories, $0.02
1 (14.5 ounce) can diced tomatoes: 82 calories, 0 g fat, $1.39 (ouch)
2 cups dry lentils: 1356 calories, 4.1 g fat, $0.48
4 cups water: negligible fat and calories, free
4 cups chicken stock: 346 calories, 11.5 g fat, $0.92
2 tablespoons vinegar: negligible fat and calories, $0.24
salt to taste: negligible fat and calories, $0.02
ground black pepper to taste: negligible fat and calories, $0.02
TOTAL: 2139 calories, 43.1 g fat, $4.15
PER SERVING (TOTAL/6): 356.5 calories, 7.2 g fat, $0.69

Wacky Cakes and Crazy Ladies

While certain neighborhoods retain (and deserve) their reputation as somewhat less than pleasant, large chunks of Brooklyn have become safer than four out of five Disney World Lands. (Land of Tomorrow harboring dangerous criminals, of course.) Still, no matter where you live in the borough, sometimes you have to be on your guard. Sometimes at the supermarket.

The Boyfriend and I decided to bake 14 billion Christmas cookies this weekend, for use as gifts, potluck submissions, and building material. In order to accomplish this, we needed butter. Many, many pounds of butter. So, off to Key Food we sojourned, where we were greeted by The Loon, self-appointed Keeper of the Dairy Section.

Though she bore no indicative Key Food employee nametag, we first encountered The Loon applying random prices on boxes of Coffeemate. She turned her attention to us when I, knowing it would be half-price at checkout, procured only one of the Buy One Get One Free boxes of unsalted Hotel Bar quarters.

I was a good eight paces away when I heard “Miss, miss! You forgot your free butter!” I turned, thinking a kind worker was trying to save me a buck. The Loon took this opportunity to grab my arm and guide me back to butter section, where we proceeded to argue over the pricing process of major supermarkets. It went something like this:

ME: Ma’am, thank you, but I’m okay.
THE LOON: No honey, you ain’t. Take this. Put it in your freezer. Don’t you want your free butter?
ME: No, I’m okay. Thanks.
THE LOON (pushes butter in my hand): No, here take it. You want it.
ME: Thanks, no. They go on sale for this price about every three weeks. I have two at home. They’re on sale for the same cost at Pathmark.
THE LOON: No they ain’t.
ME: Yes they are.
THE LOON: No they ain’t.
ME: Yes they are.
THE LOON: No they ain’t.
ME: Yes they … I gotta go.
THE LOON: Okay, lady. Whatever. (Puts butter back angrily.)
ME (ideally): Crazypants, I’ve written all about this particular subject for the last seven months. I keep a price book and shop here every week. You, on the other hand, are killing time hugging milk cartons and putting price stickers on your hat. Thanks, but you’re wrong and I’m good.
ME (actually): Thanks, though. (Scuttles away)

In retrospect, I’m glad the butter wasn’t shoved in my eye socket. And I’m super-glad that when The Boyfriend and I checked out, The Loon was being yelled at by a group of managers for unlawful use of a price gun.

This recipe, then, is dedicated to her. It’s Wacky Cake, a delightful vegan chocolate confection with no eggs, no milk, and most importantly, no butter. It was suggested by commenter Sally, and comes from the extraordinarily nifty Where’s the Revolution Blog. (If you’re a vegetarian, vegan, omnivore, carnivore, or harbor an unnatural obsession with tempeh, head on over.) The batter took about five minutes to come together, and cost a quarter to $0.50 less than most store-bought mixes. Top it off with powdered sugar and serve it for your favorite lunatic today!

Wacky Cake
12 delicious slices
Adapted from Where's the Revolution?

1-1/2 cups minus 1 TB unbleached all-purpose flour
1 cup sugar
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 tablespoon white vinegar
1/3 cup canola oil
1 cup icy cold water
powdered sugar for garnish, optional

1) Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease an 8x8-inch square pan or a 9-inch pie pan.

2) In a large mixing bowl, combine flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda, and salt. Then, make three wells or indentations in that mixture. Pour vanilla into the first, vinegar into the second, and oil into the third. Douse everything with cold water and stir until all ingredients are just barely combined/moist.

3) Pour mixture into prepared pan. Bake for 25 or 30 minutes, "or until it springs back when touched lightly."

Approximate Calories, Fat and Price Per Serving
178 calories, 6.6 g fat, $0.09

Calculations
1 1/2 cups minus 1 TB unbleached all-purpose flour: 654 calories, 1.8 g fat, $0.08
1 cup sugar: 774 calories, 0 g fat, $0.33
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa: 49 calories, 3 g fat, $0.32
1 teaspoon baking soda: negligible calories and fat, $0.02
1/2 teaspoon salt: negligible calories and fat, $0.01
1 teaspoon vanilla: 12 calories, 0 g fat, $0.13
1 tablespoon white vinegar: 3 calories, 0 g fat, $0.03
1/3 cup canola oil: 640 calories, 74,7 g fat, $0.20
1 cup icy cold water: negligible calories and fat, $0.00
powdered sugar for garnish, optional
TOTAL: 2132 calories, 79.5 g fat, $1.12
PER SERVING (TOTAL/12): 178 calories, 6.6 g fat, $0.09